Tall story

Today, I tried wearing high heel shoes for the first time in months. They ripped my feet to shreds and I now have blisters on two of my toes. I’ve never been a good heels-wearer – I teeter about like a man in drag and find my toes and balls of my feet are in agony after a few hours. If I ever tried out being a dominatrix, it would have to be in steel toe capped Doc Marten boots…

So, why put myself through this agony? I’ve met a lovely, gorgeous man who is quite a bit taller than me so thought I would try ‘rising to the occasion’.

It’s been a while since I have dated anyone over 5ft 11, so I am out of practice in the challenges presented by those extra inches. So here are some of the pros and cons of dating a taller man, in case you are going through the same thing, considering one, or you are a taller man yourself:

Cons

– Kissing gives you a very stiff neck when you have your head constantly tilted upwards

– Standing on tiptoes can only remedy this for a few seconds before your feet start to ache

– He gets a completely different view of things to you, so you are never quite looking at the same horizon.

– Walking together, holding hands or arms around each other can get a bit wonky and disjointed as his stride is twice the length of yours – rather like being matched to the wrong person in a three-legged race.

Pros

– Standing next to a tall guy makes you feel like a dainty little lady, however big you are – the joys of proportions-

– He completely wraps you up in a cuddle, as you fit into his chest and are enclosed in his long arms like a swaddled baby

– He has a totally different view of the world to you so can probably spot rain clouds or seagulls before you do

– His feet are massive, so your shoes next to his look like little doll shoes

– He can reach things off the top shelf so you don’t have to climb up on that wobbly kitchen chair again

– Lying down on the bed, you are both the same height, so size differences don’t matter

– (I’m only guessing on this one, but) performing a blow job won’t be so taxing if you don’t have to kneel down – it is going to be higher up, isn’t it?

Ah, it seems there are more pros than cons, so maybe tall is the way to go, but I have dated my fair share of short guys, so could draw up similar lists for them. Maybe I will see how it goes with my lovely tall man first…

Contradictions

I want to be strong and independent alone
But yearn to be held in the arms of someone
To spread myself out in my double bed
But to wake to a cuddle and kiss on the head
Have the kitchen to myself and cook what I please
But for someone to make me a cup of tea.

I want to have the remote to choose my own telly
But snuggle on the sofa, my head on his belly
To wear my pyjamas from six thirty
But be passionately kissed and talk dirty
To eat what, where and when I wish
But to cook up a feast for a handsome dish.

I want to look out the window and drift away in my mind
But for someone grab me for a squeeze from behind
To relax with a film or book without distraction
But to be led upstairs for some steamy action
To sleep soundly, without a snore beside me
But for sex-whipped sheets to make a stormy sea.

I want to have my own space to be free
But for someone to want and need me
To be the one in charge and fight my own fight
But someone to say it will all be alright
So, can one be together and apart,
If anyone comes to claim my heart?